My friend says, “You know the thing most ‘shooters’ have in common?”


“Most shooters are either living w/ their folks or living alone. They have limited inter-personal skills and almost all lack a significant, long term partner for intimacy and romance.”

“You mean they don’t have a steady girlfriend.”

“Hell, they don’t even get laid semi-regular.”

“Says who?”

“Says me…and most respected experts on this subject.”

“I’ve got a girl friend.”

“But your not getting laid.”

“That’s only coz…”

“I know,” says my friend. “Don’t worry, this is not about you.”

“If not me, who?”



“Tim. He’s been alone for 15 years. He’s surly, alternately loud, then quiet. Thinks folks are out to get him. Admires women from afar, puts them on a pedestal till they step down and run off w/ another guy leaving him shocked, surprised and wondering how he could get fooled again. I am truly worried about Tim.”

“How can we help him?”

“Well, I guess we can accompany him when he drives out to the commissary on base for groceries or the outlet mall where he shops for cross-trainers every month. I mean, if he snaps, it’ll almost certainly be at one of those two places.”

“Isn’t there anything else we can do?”


I closed my eyes, made the sign of the cross and said a prayer right then and there for Tim. I prayed for the victims of the latest shootings, the guy who did the shooting, and I prayed for my friend just in case he was kidding. Hell, I prayed that I’d be forgiven for sayin’ I had a girlfriend just in case she was kidding.


About joefingas

I am a songwriter, poet, blues singer, and a boogie woogie piano player. I have a grandson but I have no children of my own. All my women have wised up and left me. I was a bum, a wino, a drug/alcohol counselor, a prevention/intervention specialist and a pretender. I have no more time to pretend.
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